I told Robbie I'd write this one, and this is a much shorter story than my drunken-night-in-jail one so I figured I'd knock this out first. The gist is fairly simple and probably could have fit into 140 characters, but I've never been one to be low on words, so here it is as a blog post:
When Wifey turned 30 this year I offered to take her back to Napa to celebrate. She said "Let's go somewhere different" so we started doing some research and settled on Washington State. Walla Walla is freaking cool! It's a lot like those small towns around the Napa/Sonoma area that have a lot of downtown tasting rooms, yet tasting rooms at the wineries too if you care to venture out (a lot like Healdsburg if you've ever been there). We spent a few days in Walla Walla and then went up to the Yakima area.
I'm not going to make this a post about our trip, because I don't remember enough of it now to make it informative and it definitely wouldn't be as entertaining. So that being said, during our last day in Walla Walla we visited Nicholas Cole's downtown tasting room and were being served by an obviously gay guy #notthattheresanythingwrongwiththat (as you'll see later...). So he was a whole lot of fun and we were talking and really enjoying ourselves. We all started talking about their "reserve" blend that they "DO NOT SERVE TASTINGS OF." Well I thought that this was unacceptable and started working my infamous mojo. I was complimenting, smiling, and practically touching his arm. Hell I almost sent Wifey to the car just so I could "get rid of his competition." Well it turns out I'm not the mojo worker I once was and I seem to have lost a LOT of game over the past 10 years because this dude didn't open up shit. Bitch. It's either that or I make a shitty gay man.. But because I am a man and have an ego I don't like to think that he rejected me as a man, I prefer to think that I just didn't work it hard enough that day.
So yes, apparently I'll do just about anything for wine, especially good wine, including flirting with gay pourers. At one point he even said (after my mojo working) "It's hard to be this beautiful" to which I responded "I know, isn't it!" *bat eyelashes*. I must have left my game in Arizona. Maybe the fact that my wife was with me hinted that I really wasn't that into him... Oh well, we did end up buying some bottles from Nicholas Cole (because they have great wine at very good prices) but I never did taste that reserve.
Well that's my short story y'all. Hope you laughed at me! (I sure did!)
-FBW
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